How I make my kale green smoothie


  • Bunch of Kale
  • Many types and derives from the Wild Cabbage family. Smaller the leaf the sweeter the taste. Known to contain residual pesticide. Non organic look for leaves with holes and bugs

  • 1 x Citrus
  • Citrus juice is the key to changing the perceived flat earthy flavor to a tarty, spiritedly and plausible taste.
    The older+mature the vegetables the more citrus required.

  • 1 x tray of Ice
  • Critical to blending your Kale finely and quickly. Get into the habit of filling it immediately after. No ice in the morning equals no smoothie.

    Tip #1: Kale, lime and ice (+water) are all you need. Other ingredients are optional.

    Tip #2: Living in a group house? Make it clear – not refilling ice is punishable by a rotting wet towel flicking

  • 1/4 cup Chia seed
  • Regarded as a super food and chock full of protein and good fats.
    Chia turns generates gel when left to site in water. Shaking your finished smoothie later will blend the gel (omega 3 fat) and act as an emulsifier. I buy in bulk on e-bay.

  • 1-2 tables spoons Udo’s 3-6-9
  • Great for complexion, expensive, fridge life of 8 weeks (can be freezed) and makes one super horny.

    Tip: No time to let smoothie sit? UDO’s is excellent for stopping separation making for a smooth chunkless texture

  • 3-6 drops 50/50 Ginkgo \ Brahmi mix
  • Believed by some to enhance learning and memory retention.
    What evidence there is suggests taking daily to build up a residual. I took it for 7 months daily and felt it made a different but who knows? Any brain needs met were likely from high daily does of omega 3.

    TIP: Save money and convenience and buy in liquid form from a natural medicine shop for approx $25 100ml (last 3-6 months)


  • Nano-bags
  • Locate at your local market. I’ve use them and they work brilliantly. All moisture evaporates and the greens come out crisper then when they went in. Nano bags don’t work with bananas and tomatoes but who puts them in the fridge anyway?

  • The Blender
  • Shop for a minimum 600W, Ice crushing blades, big jug (1.5L) and surge button.
    I love my Sunbeam Blender Pro. Reliable and easy to replace parts. (blended my lid once….)

  • Container
  • You won’t be drinking the amount of fibre generated in one go so you need storage.
    When shopping for a bottle look for big mouth; solid grip; 1L plus; Odour and shatter resistant; made from 100% BPA free plastic; dishwasher and freezer safe.
    Yep it’s right here


  1. Add Ice
  2. Refill yo

  3. Add Kale
  4. Wedge Kale stalks next to ice so they touch blades.

  5. Add Water (just under 2/3rd)
  6. Too little and you won’t get traction too much and the smoothie will overflow

  7. Prime Kale
  8. Pump the surge button. Blades pull Kale into blades and use the ICE and water as an abrasive. Go to next step when Kale and ice is well and truly jammed into blades.

  9. Start Blending
  10. Different to video – I add subsequent ingredients while I blend. It gives me more control over observing texture. Pay close attention to the sound the blender makes as different ingredients are added. In the end it just makes the morning a little more exciting.

  11. Add Lemon
  12. Roll lime\lemons to break down juice compartments for easy squirt. Don’t use juicer. One more thing to wash up.

  13. Add Chia, Udo’s oil, Ginkgo\Brahmi
  14. Paying attention to texture and sound. What do you hear?

  15. Blend for 2 minutes

For best results let rest for 10-15 minutes then blend again for 60 seconds.

Poor into your container. Quickly wash your jug (nothing sticky here). Head out the door.


  • nathanscott

    Hi Cam. Great post.
    Where’s the best place to get kale in Melbourne/St Kilda?

  • Camerongrn

    Thanks Nath! My first comment in a long time!!! I get my Kale from Vic Market Organics Stall. Any market or organic store will have it. Organic Kale is best because Kale is known to suck up the pesticide. The downside to Kale is it may come with Aphids… I’ve been blending the little critters and have a quora question up to see will it make me sick.

    By the way. Freezer is the way to go instead of the breathable bags I was using.

  • nathanscott

    Ok, great. I’ll have to check them out.
    As for the Aphids, sounds like they’re a harmless side-serving of protein. :)